You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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