I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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