we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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