no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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