She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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