We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
