It's Friday. Sex?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
