weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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