they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
