Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize