She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
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I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
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WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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