you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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