they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
