Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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