i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
wow bdsm is so cute
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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