my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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