I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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