Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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