My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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