He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You are the jesus of drinking
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
