Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize