super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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