There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize