and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
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I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
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I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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