It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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