Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
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She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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