If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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