forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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