She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
