drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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