Whatcha textin bout Willis?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize