this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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