if you like me you must not know who I am
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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