what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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