Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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