We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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