oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
