He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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