i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
