Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
