Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
