why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
