I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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