So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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