guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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