Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize