omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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