I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
