Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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