is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
so let's talk penis.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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